who would have thought
Love would sneak up on me,
not in a whirlpool of dizzying attraction
or in the form of a charming devil
Or a toxicity so familiar it feels like home.

who would have thought
Love would find me
when I wasn't yearning for it,
when I almost didn't believe in it any more.

who would have thought
Love would come home to me
in crocheted sunflowers, and month-versary gifts of my favourite tea,
in satin pillowcases and a detangling comb!
not because I asked for them
but because Love saw me and noticed what was important,
what was missing, what I would really like.

who would have thought
Love would look like a man remembering
to carry my home slippers every place we travel to
because he knows I have achy feet.
actually, who would have thought
Love would look like a man remembering anything at all
a note tucked away in his head,
not as a weapon to hurt me later (this, I knew all too well from the past)
but to remind me that I am precious.

who would have thought
Love would look like finally being seen,
like not having to shrink myself to fit,
like being celebrated because we both know I'm extra.

who would have thought
Love would look like a man watching curly girl videos,
taking time out to explain an expense tracker,
and planning date nights from 427 miles away.

who would have thought
Love would feel like an arm
that finds the crook of my neck in just the right place
until I fall asleep.

who would have thought
Love would feel like finally sleeping through the night
undisturbed, unfazed, safe
for the first time in years.

who would have thought
Love would come knocking
and I would open the door
despite the fears and the trauma and the hurt.

who would have thought
Love would mean staying and talking
and sharing a silence
when the world became too loud.

who would have thought
a man would learn to love me
just the way I wanted, just the way I needed.